How to end or get over a toxic relationship?

Relationships can represent a significant challenge for some people, considering that it is a mutual agreement of coexistence that both parties must respect a series of rules. Sometimes it is observed that at the beginning of a relationship of this type there is a healthy and happy coexistence, however, as time goes by, a series of difficulties eventually begin to appear that significantly affect this balance.

When the couple’s relationships show considerable levels of toxicity, it is time to take certain measures. It is likely that there is a need to end this relationship or instead try to rescue it and improve those aspects that have violated coexistence. For this, it is necessary that the two people show the same interest and dedication to achieve this common goal.

In this article we will briefly explain what toxic relationships consist of, as well as important basic information to be able to end or overcome a relationship of this type . It will try to analyze and describe which are those aspects that are most relevant in these situations, and advice is provided to deal with them.

What is a toxic relationship?

toxic love affair can be easily detected by contrast. A healthy relationship is distinguished by its actors protecting their lives; that is, they take care of their interests, their hobbies and their socio-cultural interests. The couple takes care of well-being and tranquility in both directions; that is, mutually.

In addition, it should be noted that the individual (individual by definition) is responsible for giving meaning to his life and the company (another individuality) must be to enhance the single life. It is an addition, not a subtraction. Unhappiness or happiness depends on each one; it is a mistake to try to find your own happiness by joining another person.

When the above does not happen, even if the passion for that person seems to overflow, the love relationship with that person would be doomed to failure. Very often the desire for companionship can lead to toxic relationships. This is why it is so important to possess the qualities of emotional maturity .

How to get out of a toxic relationship if your partner controls you?

Toxic relationships do the opposite of good relationships; the bad ones make you lose the compass of growth and cancel the motivation that you felt in the single life. Also, there is a clash of energy interests, it seems that far from enhancing the positive energies they vanish.

The experience of toxic relationships regularly indicates the emergence of tensions, demands, fears, mistrust, and stagnation in past conflicts. Phrases like the following will surely seem familiar to you: -you told me it would not happen again-, -where you were the weekend, you left without warning-. In toxic relationships, which include extreme cases of emotional dependence and abuse, there is no room for growth as a couple.

Usually after a long period of time the affected people manage to realize that they have been the victims of manipulation by the partner. In these cases the impotence and frustration that this generates is observed , consequently people commonly do not know how to react. It is important to always have the help of a trusted person to whom this information is communicated, later limits must be established so that the influence of said person finally ends.

Controlling people often apply various kinds of tactics that have so far produced the expected results. Unfortunately, in these situations you will have to react quickly to prevent these gimmicks from continuing. It is always recommended that the victims go to medical professionals of psychology, they are because the emotional consequences must be treated in a timely manner .

It is notorious to observe that in relationships where manipulation occurs, there is disagreement regarding the lack of interest, support and emotional deficiencies.The members of healthy love relationships are the main fans of their partners: they are the first to cheer, accompany and support the partners. professional achievements of the same. The extreme is indicative that you are in the middle of a toxic relationship. The following describes which aspects should be analyzed in depth:

  • It seems then that before the unequivocal signs of a toxic relationship, you must immediately move away from that situation. It is a recommendation that every sensible person endorses. Stay away while you have time to do so. However, people are understandably complicated and need to stumble regularly several times to learn how to withdraw. In addition, human nature takes its time, because emotions are not quantifiable and cannot be disconnected in an instant.
  • The logical and rational thing is to move forward; but, human reality is loaded with subjectivities. If you think you require a psychotherapist (and even a specialist in couples) do not hesitate to consult him; But the broader recommendation is that you must objectively redefine your priorities .
  • Inner peace and happiness should be in the foreground. In toxic relationships that have been going on for years, it is very likely that there are children, who are also psychologically damaged by the bad relationship that their parents have.
  • Life is one. If your emotional relationship has been diminishing your will to live, it is because you definitely have a high dose of toxicity. The only option is to cut off the love affair and redirect your life. People who try to shed toxic relationships also seek to enroll in new projects (cultural, professional, community, etc.)
  • Duels happen, although at the moment it seems impossible. What’s more, empowerment through the projection of a new life greatly facilitates overcoming love pain . Reclaiming your old human environments and opening up to new ideas is the way to go.
  • Lost control must be regained . It is likely that when you were single you felt like a person in full control of your life. That feeling must be recovered. True love does not hurt, it is the sum of wills towards better and more comprehensive goals.

How to get out of a toxic relationship if your partner verbally violates you?

It is clear that toxic bonds harm people in their individuality. Before things continue to get darker, take precautions so as not to fall into the vicious cycle of bad relationships for long years. Here are some tips:

  • A very popular concept, self-esteem. In reality, people manage to get out of toxic relationships when they resize their self-concept or self-perception. Regaining self-esteem is an essential part of the process of separating from toxic bonds.
  • Those close friends or family who are still side-by-side in toxic ties are sometimes the ones who help break out of them. They stay so close as to realize the toxicity of the relationship and so distant not to be a part of it. With a cool head, those close friends can be essential to know how to interpret what happens there. If friends say that something bad happens with their partner, it is because it really is.
  • Separation is the first step , heartbreak comes later. Confusion is a normal feeling in troubled relationships; But, it should not for this reason be deprived of the urgency of putting things in their place.
  • It is known that emotional dependency is a case study of psychology. And the pictures in which both are emotionally dependent, one passive and the other dominant, can lead to verbal and physical violence on the part of the man. Here the assistance of professional support services (specialized in gender violence) is especially required, because it is the most suitable way to channel actions in a more secure way.
  • When you have enough clarity, it is essential to prioritize emotional health. The psychological consequences produced by the breakup in particular situations are known. Feelings of guilt, lightheadedness, burnout, and shame are recurring and require a slow healing process.

How to get out of a toxic relationship if your partner hits you?

The wear and tear produced by these toxic relationships, in the attempt to lighten the load, is colossal, humanly speaking. Episodes of physical violence are the darkest and most damaging points of toxic bonds. Therefore, attention should be focused on avoiding reaching the indicated extremes. One piece of advice that is never enough is to stay close to the people who love you and ask for their support while the separation process takes place.

Suffering is an indication that you are in a toxic relationship. Manipulative, possessive and disqualifying behaviors can never enter the repertoire of normalized behaviors. And if it happens it is because the problem has escalated to the proper structure of the couple.

No one is obliged to stay by someone’s side if they don’t want to because of more commitments and documents that they have signed, but the reality sometimes outweighs the wishes. In any situation, there is room for advice and recommendations with the aim of collaborating in people’s understanding and awareness.

The process of separating from a toxic relationship can be long and tedious, but it is well worth it for your emotional and physical well-being. Body separation guarantees personal safety in extreme cases. On the sidelines is the process of emotional separation, which will inevitably begin to the extent that he sees how his life regains its meaning. The so-called emotional mourning is perfectly normal and necessary to heal emotional wounds and close that dark stage of your life to move on to other more productive ones.

Social psychology understands that states of emotional dependence are dysfunctional and include sociocultural factors, such as the situation in which individuals live, factors of family uprooting, economic pressures and the fear of loneliness and helplessness. That is why the protection of women and their children in situations of gender violence requires the concert of specialized institutions and agencies.

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Alexa Clark specializes in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. She has experience in listening and welcoming in Individual Therapy and Couples Therapy. It meets demands such as generalized anxiety, professional, love and family conflicts, stress, depression, sexual dysfunction, grief, and adolescents from 15 years of age. Over the years, She felt the need to conduct the psychotherapy sessions with subtlety since She understands that the psychologist acts as a facilitator of self-understanding and self-acceptance, valuing each person's respect, uniqueness, and acceptance.

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